


You're a Mad Genius

by ImperialKatwala



Series: We're Only Young [8]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Floof is the coolest and Techno would die for him, Fluff, Friendly competition, Friendship, Gen, Nice and happy to balance out the angst from last time :), Video Game Mechanics, why is that not a real tag?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-02
Updated: 2020-12-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 20:21:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27832204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImperialKatwala/pseuds/ImperialKatwala
Summary: Techno and Dream realize there's a problem with their prank ideas. They fix this problem in the coolest way they can think of.
Relationships: Clay | Dream & Dave | Technoblade
Series: We're Only Young [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2021213
Comments: 47
Kudos: 766





	You're a Mad Genius

"So, to summarize," Dream sighed, looking over the papers scattered around them, "we have everything planned out for when we prank people, but we can't ensure Floof's safety during all of it."

Techno nodded sadly. "People's first instinct will be to try and kill him."

"These ideas are great, though!" Dream pouted, picking up a random sheet of paper with scribbled ideas. Techno still wasn't used to actually _seeing_ the pout instead of just hearing it; Dream had started occasionally taking his mask off when it was just the two of them. "I don't want to have to come up with more."

Techno hummed in agreement, glancing over the papers himself. Then, suddenly, an idea struck him, and he started scribbling a rough drawing. "What if we did somethin' like this?"

Dream leaned over to look, and as the concept emerged, a wide, mischievous grin appeared on his face. "Techno, you're a mad genius. Let's do it."

* * *

"Ten beds for you, ten for me, fire resistance potions for both of us," Techno listed off, handing Dream his items.

"You have your pickaxe and some blocks?" Dream asked, quickly organizing his inventory and doing a final double-check.

Techno nodded. He'd checked a minute ago.

Dream nodded back, and Techno knew he was grinning. "Perfect. Drink your fire resist in three, two, one."

They drank their potions together, then went to the fork in the tunnel that they'd made for exactly this purpose.

Dream's hand hovered over his communicator. "We go in opposite directions, and the first one to find ancient debris wins. I'm starting the timer in three, two, one, _go!_ "

Moving almost in unison, they placed down beds and braced for the explosions.

Bed-bombing the Nether to find ancient debris was fun, but extraordinarily destructive and very dangerous; maybe that's where most of the fun came from. The fire resistance was a very necessary component, though, Techno decided as he waded through hissing, crackling flames.

Lots of fire, an exposed lava pocket, some quartz. No debris. He placed the next bed and ducked behind a wall.

The bed exploded in a fireball, and more lava poured from the ceiling. Still no debris, he noted with a frustrated huff, looking around the crater. Time for the third bed.

Just before he could place it, though, his communicator buzzed.

[Dream]: _GOT IT_

[Technoblade]: _if it's not in your inventory it doesn't count green boy_

Time to _move._ Techno placed his third bed, ducked away from the explosion, and ran into the fiery crater.

_Finally,_ there was some ancient debris! A big vein of it, too, he could see at least three. Unfortunately, just then, his communicator buzzed at him again.

[Dream]: _mined and collected_

[Technoblade]: _booo_

[Dream]: _race you to half a stack?_

Hmm. Techno eyed the vein he'd just found.

[Technoblade]: _you're on_

* * *

"This should make more than enough netherite," Techno decided, splitting their stack of ancient debris between four of his eight travel furnaces.

Dream was lounging on top of the furnaces like a cat in a sunbeam, resting on his laurels (Forty-seven seconds, he'd beaten Techno by _forty-seven seconds_ ). "So we use what we need and split the rest?"

"Sounds fair," Techno agreed, setting gold to smelt in the remaining furnaces. "We've just got to figure out how to actually make what we need to make."

Dream hummed thoughtfully. "Well, we have two options. We can try and make it ourselves, or we can commission it. Personally, I'm leaning toward commissioning, since neither of us are trained blacksmiths and this is going to be pretty complicated. Quality over sentiment in this case."

Techno nodded. "Yeah, I agree. I'd rather know it's made well. Do you have someone in mind?"

"Not at the moment, but I'll find someone. Leave it to me."

* * *

[Dream]: _found a blacksmith_

[Technoblade]: _I'm assuming they have high rates for something like this?_

[Dream]: _yeah_

[Dream]: _we can supply her with the materials for it though so it isn't too bad_

[Dream]: _I offered her some of our leftover netherite for payment, if that's okay_

[Technoblade]: _yeah that's fine, we got it specifically for this project_

[Dream]: _cool, I'll let her know_

[Dream]: _she says it'll be done in like a week_

[Technoblade]: _awesome_

* * *

It was a fairly quiet day on the server. Everyone was mostly keeping to themselves, working on personal projects and taking a much-needed break from the chaos.

Techno was at his potato farm, humming quietly to himself as he planted new potatoes, when his communicator buzzed with a new message.

_Dream whispered to you: community house :)_

_Dream whispered to you: we got a package today_

For a brief moment, Techno was confused. Then he realized there was only one thing Dream could be talking about, and a wide, excited grin appeared on his face.

_You whispered to Dream: on my way_

Techno took a moment to brush the dirt from his hands, then booked it out of the ravine, not bothering to put his cloak and crown back on. There was no time for that! He stopped by his stables just long enough to untie Carl, and then he was riding for the community house.

Dream was waiting for him just outside. "I haven't opened the box yet, I thought we should do it together."

Techno nodded in thanks, hopping off of Carl and tying him to a nearby fence post so he wouldn't wander off.

"Hey, what were you doing when I messaged you?" Dream asked curiously as he led Techno inside. "You aren't dressed like normal."

Techno shrugged. "Farmin'. Don't need a cape and a crown for that."

"Fair enough."

"Is that it?" Techno asked, catching sight of a large box in the middle of the floor. It had Dream's name on it.

Dream nodded enthusiastically and hurried over to it, sitting down on the far side. "I've been _dying_ to open this thing, you have no idea."

Techno sat down as well, taking out a knife and carefully cutting away the adhesive that held the box shut. He took hold of one side of the lid, and Dream grabbed the other. "On three?"

"On three."

"One, two, three!"

Together, they opened the box.

There wasn't much to see at first, of course. All of the pieces of their project had been wrapped in wool to protect them during transportation. But there they were, packed neatly into the box, ready and waiting.

Techno reached carefully inside and picked up one of the smaller pieces, gently unwrapping it with quiet reverence, as it deserved.

A netherite pauldron, too big for a human, shone up at him.

Dream whistled softly. "Wow."

"It's beautiful," Techno whispered, turning it over in his hands to appreciate every bit of the incredible craftsmanship.

Dream picked up and unwrapped another piece, a greave this time. He held it up to his own leg and snorted at the sheer size of it. "Dude."

Techno grinned, setting the pauldron down and rummaging through the box for the other. "Yeah."

" _Dude._ "

"I know!"

"Let's do one of the big ones," Dream suggested, his voice filled with glee. "Tech, I want to see one of the big ones, c'mon."

The excitement was infectious. Techno helped his friend pull out one of the massive metal plates meant to be side armor, and he let out a delighted laugh at the size and quality of it. The thing was absolutely gorgeous.

Working together, they unpacked the rest of the armor, laughing over it and gushing about how nice it looked.

Then they found the helmet.

" _Tech,_ " Dream wheezed, holding it up for Techno to see. " _Look_ at it!"

He wasn't sure what it was about this; the excitement of a plan coming together, maybe, or the wonder that this armor existed at all, or the ridiculous scale of each piece when they were so used to wearing their own. But something about this situation caused him to reach out on impulse, carefully take the helmet from Dream, and put it on.

Dream started cackling so hard he fell over, wheezing that teakettle laugh of his.

Techno laughed, too; the helmet was _not_ built for him. It was so big that he had to tilt it up to see out of it, and it was awkwardly shaped. He was reminded suddenly, ridiculously, of the time he'd tried on Phil's coat when he was much younger. The fabric had nearly swallowed him, since he'd had no idea how to put it on right and it had caught on his ears. He remembered Phil finding him, laughing in that way that said he was laughing with Techno and not at him, before showing him how to wear it properly. For just a moment, wearing a gigantic helmet for no reason, laughing with his friend, he felt like a kid again.

Eventually, though, Techno took the helmet off, and they both managed to calm down.

"So," Dream said, taking a steadying breath, "should we go see if it fits?"

Techno grinned. "Let's."

The journey to Floof's pen, long memorized by both of them, was made substantially faster with Carl's help. Dream hadn't ridden the horse before, and was suitably impressed when Techno smugly told him that Carl was only his fourth fastest.

Floof snorted at them as they rode up to the pit, and Techno cheerfully huffed back as they dismounted and he tethered Carl. Dream attempted a huff as well, and Techno only teased him a little for it. He really was getting better the more he practiced.

"How are you, Floof?" Techno asked, dropping down into the pit and slipping into a tone of voice he only used around his animals. Dream usually described it as baby-talking. Techno usually ignored him when he described it that way.

Floof rumbled and gave him a gentle headbutt.

Techno grinned at him and gave him a good scratch behind the ears. "Good, good. You're glad to see me, aren't you? I've got a present for you. Dream helped me with it, you remember Dream?"

"Of course he remembers me, he's a smart boy," Dream hummed, giving Floof a tentative pat on the head.

Floof responded by snorting and headbutting Dream as well, knocking him over with a yelp.

Techno burst out laughing.

"Yeah, yeah," Dream grumbled as he stood back up, but there was a lilt to his voice that told Techno he was smiling. "Let's just get this over with."

The two of them quickly took the set of armor, piece by piece, out of their inventories. It made quite the impressive pile, and Techno was once again grateful that weight didn't really translate when something was put in his inventory.

"We're just gonna make sure this fits you," he told Floof quietly, setting the back piece in place while Dream fastened the straps. "You're gonna look so intimidatin', everyone's gonna be so scared of you. And they won't even be able to hurt you, because this is netherite! You'll be really safe wearin' this."

Dream shook his head fondly and passed Techno a pauldron.

Techno took it and fastened it in place. "We don't want you gettin' hurt, you know. The others won't know you're friendly, so we've gotta protect you until they do."

Floof rumbled at him and nudged at his leg.

"Yeah, I know it's a little heavy, but you've got to stay still," Techno told him gently, grabbing a side plate from the pile. "This is just for a little bit. We'll take it off you once we're sure you're comfortable in it."

Dream chuckled. "There is _no_ way you actually understood what he said there. No possible way."

"Of course I did, Dream." Techno finished attaching the plate and moved on to a greave. He stopped to listen as Floof made a little grumbling noise. "He just said you're dumb and need to give him food immediately."

"No he didn't."

"Yes he did!"

"No, I refuse to believe you can actually understand him. No."

Floof snorted.

Techno nodded sagely. "He's insulted that you don't believe me and wants to eat you."

Dream wheezed again. "No, he isn't."

"He is."

"No he isn't!" Dream pointed to the last greave. "Hand me that?"

Techno handed it over. "Yes he is."

Dream fastened it in place and stood up, dusting off his hands. "Well, whatever he said -"

"- He said he wants to eat you-"

"- _Whatever_ he said," Dream repeated firmly, "I think we're ready for the helmet now. Do you want to do the honors?"

Techno instantly dropped the little argument with a happy gasp. "Yeah!!"

Dream laughed and gestured to the massive helmet. "Go for it."

Grinning excitedly, Techno picked up the helmet and carefully set it on Floof's head, fastening the straps to secure it in place.

"Dude," Dream said with a hint of awe in his voice. He had taken a step back to take in the whole effect of the armor. "He looks _awesome._ "

"Hell yeah he does," Techno said with no small amount of pride, scratching Floof under the chin.

Floof rumbled happily.

Techno took a step back as well, then took a closer look at all of the parts, tugging on straps, making sure nothing was digging in or sitting weirdly. Dream did the same. After a careful, critical examination, they both came to the same conclusion: the armor fit beautifully. The blacksmith had done an incredible job, and nothing was out of place or causing Floof any undue discomfort.

"You know what we need to do now, right?" Dream asked.

Techno frowned at him. "... Take the armor back off?..."

" _No._ You need to take him for a ride."

For a moment, Techno looked at his ravager. His armored, insanely awesome-looking ravager. Who he hadn't taken out riding recently, actually, he was looking at bit restless. Techno nodded, turned to Dream, and put a hand on his shoulder. "Dream, you are absolutely right. Could you get the staircase lever?"

Dream bounced in excitement and ran over to pull the lever.

Techno swung up into the saddle, grinning as Floof pawed at the ground in anticipation. "Ready to have some fun, Floof?"

Floof snarled and tossed his head. Techno took that as a yes.

"Hey Techno!" Dream called from across the pit.

"What?"

He pointed up. "It's starting to get dark!"

Sure enough, when Techno looked up, the sky was starting to darken. It would probably be dark enough for mobs to start spawning soon -

... Hmm.

"Dream, I'm gonna go huntin'," he informed his friend, unsheathing his sword and making sure he had a sufficient number of arrows.

"I'll follow along and keep score for you," Dream replied easily, and Techno saw him ready an Ender pearl. "Ready when you are."

With a grin, Techno urged Floof forward, and they charged into battle together for the first time.

This was going to be _fun._

**Author's Note:**

> I had this exact realization when I started thinking about possible pranks, so I wrote this to make sure Floof would be safe :) And also Techno can bring him into fights now, which is pog!!!  
> (Also, the blacksmith can be whoever you want her to be! I didn't have a specific person in mind, I just needed someone to make the armor for them)


End file.
